Divorce is a life-changing experience, to say the least. For men, it can be a difficult, confusing time that leaves them with plenty of questions before they even file for divorce from their wives. Society tends to pressure men into feeling like they can’t be the ones to file for divorce because they need to “man up” and deal with the hardship. Or, they can feel an unfair expectation to “fix” or “carry” their marriage for as long as possible.
Are you thinking of divorcing your wife but understandably feel hung up on a few key questions? Here at ADAM – American Divorce Association for Men – in Michigan, we are all about doing whatever we can to help men through divorce, beginning with sharing a few questions you can ask yourself before filing.
Consider these questions to help you decide if divorce is really what you want:
- Has your wife hurt you or your kids?
First things first, you cannot live safely and happily if you or your children have been victimized by domestic violence carried out by your wife. Do what you can to get you and your children to safely, which may include calling the police and filing for a protective order. Never do anything that jeopardizes you or your children’s health and wellbeing.
- Have you spoken to your wife about your concerns with your marriage?
You will not be able to determine if there’s a workable alternative to divorce unless you talk about your concerns with your wife. Together, you might be able to hash things out, or maybe agree upon a legal separation instead of a full divorce. Even if you are confident that a divorce is the best option, you will be thankful that you talked to them about things first.
- Have you done enough for your own satisfaction to avoid divorce?
After a divorce, the person who will judge you the most for it will be yourself. It is natural to have some self-doubt about your decision to divorce well after it is concluded. But, if you put forth an honest effort to work things out, then you will be able to quell and control that doubt better in the future.
- What is the main reason you haven’t filed for divorce already?
If divorce has been weighing on your mind for a while but you haven’t filed yet, there must be a reason for your hesitation. Are you worried about what your life could look like when your divorce ends? Are you making certain assumptions about how you’ll be treated in the process that are based upon more urban legend than a proper legal analysis? As a single father, things can be much different than your norm, it’s true. But with the help of a compassionate divorce attorney, you can get answers about life after divorce upfront so you don’t have to feel uncertain.
ADAM, or the American Divorce Association for Men, is a law firm in Michigan devoted to making certain men are well-prepared for their divorces and family law disputes, before, during, and afterwards. For decades, we have been supporting men throughout Michigan and protecting their rights and best interests in a court system that tends to disfavor men due to antiquated societal biases. Get a free phone consultation by calling (248) 327-0050, or you can contact us online if you prefer.