In the aftermath of a divorce, it might be a bit difficult to effectively co-parent with your ex-wife, especially if there are some unresolved issues and hostility. However, being an effective co-parent is crucial for the well-being of your children, so it is important for you and your ex-wife to set any problems you might have with one another aside to ensure your children are raised in an environment that allows them to thrive and be happy.
To help you on your path toward becoming an exceptional co-parenting father, we prepared a list of tips:
- Get in the habit of documenting everything: In the event that some of the co-parenting issues you have with your ex-wife require legal action, it is imperative that you get in the habit of documenting your interactions, including when it happened, the nature of the event, and if anyone else witnessed what occurred. Keep these documents and records organized, so you can easily access them whenever you need them.
- Become a strong communicator: Communication is the most important element in successful co-parenting. Fathers should learn to become strong communicators and make use of a variety of communication channels, including texts, emails, phone calls, and in-person interactions. Whatever you do, never use your children to send messages to your former wife, no matter how benign the message might be. Your children should never feel like they are in the middle of issues that should be handled between you and your spouse. If you need to tell your ex-wife something, reach out to her personally. Doing so will also ensure the message does not get lost in translation.
- Have your disagreements in private: You and your ex-wife are bound to disagree, but you should make sure these disagreements and arguments are done in private. It is important to help your kids feel safe and secure and, if they see mom and dad arguing, it could cause a lot of unnecessary anxiety for them.
- Share the positive moments with their mom: If you did something fun and noteworthy with the children or took a memorable photograph of them, share it with your ex-wife. This act of goodwill will nurture a better relationship with your co-parent and she might also be willing to reciprocate as well. If you both learn to share positive moments with the children with one another, you won’t feel like you are missing out.
- Try not to be the “cool” dad: Every parent would like their children to look forward to spending time with them, but do not give in to becoming the “cool” dad and allowing the kids’ mom to carry the weight of playing a more authoritative role. Maintain the balance between fun and responsibilities instead of competing with their mother to be the cooler, more fun parent.
Hire a Skilled Family Law Attorney Today!
If you are in the midst of a family law matter, such as child custody or visitation, contact the attorneys at ADAM – American Divorce Association for Men for the experienced representation and sound legal advice you need to navigate this situation. Our attorneys have been fighting for the rights of men for over 30 years, so you can feel confident in our ability to assist you.
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